I miss UTAR.

My mailbox has somehow reached its limit I guess.
It should be time to clear some space.

I started clicking from emails to emails.
There really was a lot, but I couldn't find the heart to delete any of those.
Because those were the only times I received emails from my friends.

There were the times when my secondary classmates and college mates sent me emails.
They were soon replaced with names of my university friends.

Emails concerning assignments.
Encouraging forwarded message come near exam time.
Hilarious jokes just to make your day.
Informational messages to remind you of your safety and health.
Touching stories urging you to cherish the people around you.
Lovely messages giving you reassurance that we will be friends forever...

The names of those close friends stopped when we graduated.
Replaced with tons of emails sent by 'alumni'.

I felt a sharp pang in my heart.
We were once so close.
We once had a common topic.
How could it change so dramatically in such a short time?
I long to turn back time.
To go back to that time when we were close and out of worries.
To be able to laugh with an open heart.
To have each other as company.
It was hard to admit. All those were just temporary.

Still, I am grateful to have those friends as my friends when I need them.
I am glad to have you in my memories of my great studying life.
Thank you all for being there for me.

I end up leaving the emails untouched.
Maybe I am still not ready to look ahead.
I still want to hold on to my old times, when I was truly happy.
I am afraid to clear up those spaces as I do not wish to replace them with anything else.
I am stubborn.
It may change in time, but for now
I want to hold on.

I miss UTAR because of you all!
Thank you for the fond memories.
Thank you for the tears flowing now, because you gave me something to cry about, something to miss about.
Thank you for being my friend.
Miss you...