New Year Spirit

It's reunion dinner, a dinner to welcome the new year.

I close my eyes and open them...
I was at the kids' table, eating with children only. I could see mothers, including mine, telling me to eat all the dishes on the table, it is for good luck. Then, they were warning their children to behave and be good before proceeding to the adults' table. I would listen to laughter and business conversations coming from the adults' table while my table held the conversations of cartoons and toys. Mostly, we were just eating our meal and waiting to drink the cold drink provided for us. I could hear my mother warn me from her table to not finish my drink as I would need some left for 'yam sing' (cheers) session. I obeyed. The time finally came. With loud shouts of 'yam sing' and clinks of glasses, laughter remains while my mind were already on new year programs on television. I would secretly wish I would have a sip of ribena (which later I knew was red wine) that my parents never let me try. It was fun and we looked forward to it.

I close my eyes and open them again...
I was at the adults' table by now. Well, just of age actually. We were still having the similar dishes we've always had for the past years. However, the mood is quite different. We kind of grew tired of new year as it's the same old thing all over again. My mother would be busy preparing and would be the last to appear at the dining table. They will talk about the same boring business conversations which I did not understand. The females explaining the meaning of each dish all over again (everytime the same), chat about the freshness of the fish and start discussing about where to get the best cooking materials. Occasionally, the aunts and uncles would ask about our studies and future plans but it was always brief. It was like any other day. It was ordinary and we just celebrate for tradition purposes.

I close my eyes and open them again...
I was still at the adults' table. Of course I'm older now but I still prefer alcohol-free drinks. This time is different. The place where my grandfather used to sit was not there anymore. It feels the same yet different at the same time. We were still doing the same old things we've done for the past few years. But my grandpa was missing and I could feel my grandmother feeling it more than any of us. We can hear the clink of our glasses when we cheered, but then there was just a note missing. It was getting dull and I start to wonder the purpose for celebrating.

I close my eyes and open them again...
I am at the different table now. This seems to be my future. I am with my own family now, and I found a whole new meaning to celebrate such occasions. I am explaining to my children about the meaning of celebrating new year and also the meaning of each dish set on the dining table. They listened with wonder and exclaimed with delight. They ate the prawn, deeply believing that it will make them happier. They waited anxiously for the 'yam sing' session and was looking forward to the next year to be able to do it all over again. It was lively again but I can't help but wonder... They will eventually get bored about this. They will think it's repetitive and meaningless. Well, until they have a family of their own to have the feeling of having something new. How long will it last until the circle happens all over again? I will cherish every moment of it before it starts. I'll try.