Stupidity, my fault

I had it all once.
Once I was happy.

I took things for granted, not knowing how to think.
All is gone, just like that.

I lost the chance of being close.
I can't take that back.
There are no occasions for it, anymore.

Selfish I am.
Terrible I am.

My heart aches,
Even more than physical abuse.
It is bleeding...
And it's all my fault.

I am hopeless.
Do not deserve what you're willing to give,
Do not deserve your love,
I am.